We will only love..............

I received an email from Ann, of The Red Thread, last night.  I was hopeful that she would have some new information about Jackzhen, new information was an under statement.  The email read like this.....

Dear Mandy :

First ,I just requested xxxxx's  information for you .

Second ,the orphanage told me that one family supposed to adopt XXXX but gave him up on adoption day in June ,the orphanage staff is still very pity and sad on this part ,they worried that he got hurt on this part too,so it might take longer time for them to share updates and pictures .

Third ,I will suggest you to email me 20 more family pictures ,this way I can make one silk album for XXX,it will be better for the orphanage staff to prepare XXX for you this time ....

How??? that is what I asked her.  How could someone do this.... Why??? Why would they give their heart to a child only to take it back in the end? This poor boy has faced rejection from his birth mom when he was three weeks old, possibly because of a special need that he possesses,  spent almost 3 years of his little life in an orphanage, just to find out that his prospective adoptive family has changed their minds. I requested more information from her.  I wanted to know how much of the situation he knew about.  I was even more saddened to find out that they had, in fact, met him and then decided that "their hearts were not ready for this boy".  I felt totally deflated, I was hoping that the pictures we just sent to him would help prepare his heart and mind for our family, but instead I was fearful that it would instead frighten him from the mess he just endured.  My mind was spinning in so many directions, I was mad and sad just to name a few.  I just couldn't stop crying.... My poor boy, I just want to hold him in my arms and tell him that it will be alright very soon.  I want him to know that we will never abandon him, we will never leave him, we will only love him !

Jason just hugged me and said, it only proves that there really is a reason that this little boy was meant to be in our family! I love him for that, the strong, reassuring voice he has, comforts my heart, and I know it will be ok !
.

I spent all night and day in prayer.  I prayed for Jackzhen's heart to feel love, to feel safe, and to have a peace.  I prayed that the orphanage staff would see our love through our letter and choose to release new information to us.  I am stronger now because of this revelation and ready to blaze through this process, even more than before.  I believe that although sometimes it hurts, everything happens for a reason ! I have to keep my faith strong. I have to trust that God knew this was part of Jackzhen's story and He also knew that one day he would be in our arms! The seeds of sadness may forever mark his heart, but the love of this family will grow stronger and deeper than any circumstance that will ever come his way....